The Value of Discipline

by Mark Gordon

I have been in a bit of a transition lately which has led me into some self-discovery. There is a real desire in my heart to take my leadership skill to another level. For most of my life “discipline” was a FOUR LETTER WORD. I avoided it because it had negative experiences attached to it. I have discovered that my view of discipline was simply wrong as I always saw it as punitive rather than liberating. I know you may be thinking, “Liberating, are you kidding me?!?”

On this quest, I have been trying to figure out what my limitations were and why did it seem that I had a certain measure of success but never quite accomplished what I saw in my heart or dreams. I mused over laziness, lack of focus, lack of knowledge, lack of commitment and so on. I thought maybe more training, more hours, more money or more knowledge would get me to where I wanted to go. However none of the ‘Lacks’ or the ‘Mores’ really answered the question in my heart until the thought came to me “I simply need to be disciplined” YIKES!!

I started thinking about all what all that meant. It would mean accountability, it would mean cracking the whip, trying harder & harder but still failing. As I went through the thought in my heart I finally realized that my concept of discipline came from the wrong place. I saw it as a list of do’s and don’ts. What I have discovered is that it is more about YES & No. Yes to what brings life to me and no to what does not. In my experience, discipline has always come from an external source based on others' expectations. For example, a teacher or parent punishing me because I did not do something the way I was expected to. Everyone seemed to have an opinion on how I was to learn. I always struggled with remembering what I studied so I did poorly on tests, and then my report card would say “if Mark only applied himself he would do better.” Well I thought I had applied myself and I just didn’t understand it so I gave up trying to study (I now realize that my learning style is by ‘doing’). It is always “me” trying to measure up to “them.” Unfortunately many times it would just make me feel stupid so I eventually gave up and quit school. The problem is that it became a pattern for me that and I eventually broke. I would have a creative idea - begin to act on it and then someone would try and change the way I did it. “You should do it this way” they would say…I would fail and quit.

As a result I would run from anything structured or organized and that demanded me to do it someone else’s way! Anytime I thought of discipline I would cringe. The bottom line is that my leadership skills have hit a ceiling and the ceiling is a discipline problem. So how can I have a disciplined life and still be free - I am discovering the value of discipline is freedom!

The key for me was not to be disciplined by someone else’s abilities, personality, and skill set but MINE!! I have begun to be disciplined in what I need to do according to my goals and destiny. Let me give you three easy principals/steps I found worked for me:

1. FIND YOUR RHYTHM. I was always told the early bird gets the worm so if I was disciplined at getting up early I would be more successful. So I would decide, "Ok Mark you are going to get up early every morning this week and be more efficient." Only one problem: after the first day when I could not open my eyes and my brain wouldn’t function, the new found plan fell into the ever growing failure basket in my thinking. I was so demotivated that I would give up on ideas or projects and my goals were not met. Find out what works for you, look at when you are at your best. When you have the most energy and creativity. I am a nighthawk and I have discovered that my mind is alert and my creativity is just waking up about 9 to 11pm. (it is 9:15pm right now as I write this) I had to find ‘my’ time to do ‘my’ best work then the discipline was a lot easier. I still needed the discipline to complete my tasks as there are many distractions everyday however the discipline would produce a benefit if I did.
   

2. FIND YOUR STRENGTHS – discover your strengths and match discipline to them. An example in my life is my gifting vs. time spent on a task. I looked at what I am good at, which is “Inspiring, Facilitating, Connecting” I then looked at my tasks and appointments within a week and how many hours I spent on what I am strong at…it was shocking! No wonder I had no discipline - 80 percent of my time was spent on things that had nothing to do with my destiny or gifts. In short discipline was making me do more of the stuff I hated and it’s no wonder I threw discipline out the window. The reality was I spent time in the name of discipline to work on my weaknesses rather than spending that energy and time on my strengths and making them stronger. Discipline is easier when you see results. Focus on what is strong not what is wrong!

3. FIND YOUR PASSION – Discipline was a lot easier when I loved doing something. I discovered I am passionate about inspiring people and realized that I could do that anywhere, anytime and it changed the way I saw the job I was doing at the time. It brought joy to the tasks I did not necessarily like because I knew that the outcome would be inspiration for those around me. When you are passionate about something the value of discipline is that you get to do it more often and get better at doing it. Knowing what you’re passionate about actually produces discipline in your life. Now I realize in life we all have things we ‘have to’ do that we don’t like but the value of discipline is that if you get them done you are free to do what you ‘love’ to do. Your passion brings perspective to everything else you do.
   

My motivation for a more disciplined life is now changed as I no longer see it as punitive but as freeing. The more I function in a lifestyle of discipline the more I am seeing freedom to reach my goal of excellence in leadership!! Start today - look at your schedule and find your rhythm, discover your strengths and focus on them, and then apply both to what you are passionate about and you will see discipline as an ally rather than a foe